The World At Coachella Vs Us In Real Life
FML.
1. The hair
Kylie Jenner looked like a beautiful rainbow braided hair princess:
Our frizz threatened to suffocate us and our entire family. IT’S APRIL, IT’S NOT EVEN HUMID:
2. The casual Coachella 'bumping into' a friend:
How are Vanessa Hudgens and Emily Ratajkowski even mates?! Was it a Zefron intro?:
No Aunt Carol, this isn't a coincidence, you're in our house. And no we don't want to cross stitch with you:
3. The clothes
Kendall Jenner looked like this in the sunshine:
If the sun was up, we looked like this. It's a sort of hobo-chic, you wouldn't get it:
4. The weather
The Palm Springs weather was beyond beaut:
The UK? Not so much:
5. The make-up
Bella Hadid had Kylie Jenner touch up her make-up. Casual. ALL WE WANT IS ONE PERPETUALLY SOLD OUT CANDY K, KYLIE:
We tried clown contouring for the first time. Uuuummmmmm, it wasn't great:
6. The music
Tay Swift and her sweet new 'Bleachella' do’ shook it to her fit boyf Calvin Harris and Queen Ri-Ri:
We had to listen to our cousin Barry’s violin recital. Relax yourself Baz, it's Grade 1, let's be real.
7. The dancing
Bella Thorne looked like a Victoria's Secret Angel, dancing the eve away:
While we practised our best sexy bedroom dance moves to impress our brother's flatmate, Tim:
8. The transport
Joe Sugg and Caspar Lee grabbed a swanky private jet with their mates:
Dear Uber gods, please reverse our Uber ban for our hideously low score. We won't spill Macdonald's on the seats anymore, we swear:
9. The recovery
Shay Mitchell sunned her impossibly amazing body post-Chella:
We tried to nurse our Sunday fear while attempting to figure out what happened the night before...
So thank you VERY much Coachella for our now current mood:
SMH.