79 Thoughts I Had Playing The New Assassins Creed: Origins Game
CROCODILES! EATING OTHER ANIMALS! AND BLOOD EVERYWHERE!
The upcoming Assassin’s Creed game, Assassins Creed: Origins, takes us back in time further than any AC game before: to the VERY START of the Brotherhood, in Ancient Egypt! It's filled with sand and crocodiles and sweaty Nile adventures and a new protagonist as hot as the desert he’s venturing across: Bayek.
The new game promises RPG style elements, with skill trees that give you the choice to level up the skills you want to progress in, a HUGE world to explore with the largest Assassins Creed map ever, loads of methods of travel to explore it with – from boat, like in Assassin’s Creed: Black Flag, to camel - and the ability to call on an actual eagle to give you literal eagle vision. His name is Senu and he’s a cutie.
We got an early hands on preview with the game, and this is *everything* that went through our head while battling the desert nasties…
1. I have a horse! My lovely horse. Which is lucky because this world is big AF.
2. Ancient Egypt is gorge. This would get so many likes on Instagram.
3. Oh hello! New hero Bayek is pretty Insta worthy too. ;)
4. Time for a nice scenic gallop into town.
5. This would all be pretty vacay goals if it wasn’t for the man being flogged in front of me.
6. Wow, floggers don't give up do they?
7. If I stand here forever will the captive man get slapped forever?
8. I suppose he will.
9. This is sad now.
10. Better ask him to stop.
11. He has a QUEST for me.
12. I will avenge the poor slapped man and FREE HIM using my awesome assassin skills.
13. I have to find treasures to stop the slapping. Seems legit.
14. Let’s use my shiny new eagle BFF to get a good view and track down the hidden objects.
15. I am eagle!
16. I am soaring over the sea.
17. This is all very lovely.
18. OMFG is that an alligator?
19. THE ALLIGATOR IS EATING SOMETHING.
20. IT IS EATING A GIANT ASS HIPPO.
21. I can’t.
22. This world is tough.
23. Next to the hippo carvery! There’s my shiny treasure in the water.
24. F*ck that. I’m not going anywhere near there yet.
25. FOUND ANOTHER TREASURE (and it’s not next to anything that wants to eat me. I think.)
26. It’s hiding on a BOAT.
27. I am a man on a mission. A mission to get to a boat and stop the slapping.
28. Back in the room. Thank you eagle BFF!
29. Now to take a little boat or swim to my mark?
30. Nope, swimming is dangerous AF. I didn’t join this epic 4k adventure to be made a croc’s lunch.
31. I have climbed aboard. Call me First Mate Bayek.
32. Steering a boat is so relaxing. And fast! And I’m so dry!
33. I’ve reached my destination. Better dive into the sea to traverse the one metre to the ship I want to ransack!
34. I AM ON THE SHIP WHERE THE $$$ AT. And all the BOAT PEOPLE HAVEN’T SPOTTED ME.
35. I have achieved top assassin greatness.
36. I am an assassin ninja.
37. Oh dear I’ve accidentally knocked over some pots.
38. I am spotted.
39. I am dead.
40. I am back and this time I will traverse the pots WITH STEALTH.
41. I have taken down a man SILENTLY.
43. I have used my hidden weapon to throw this dude overboard
44. AND IT FEELS GREAT.
45. OK I am done with being silent and want to steam the eff in.
46. Fire! What will happen if I light my arrow in this warm little flame…
47. And then shoot at the barrels?
48. FIRE EVERYWHERE.
49. My marks are toast.
50. And now to pick up my lovely singed treasure.
51. The next treasure I have to pick up is out in the sea… do I dare dive in?
52. No choice, off we go! Diving under..
53. IT’S… SO… BEAUTIFUL.
54. MUST HOLD BREATH
55. Treasure! Let’s get this back to Mr Floggy…
56. Just keep swimming…
57. Avoid dem crocodiles…
58. Just keep swimming…
59. Dry land! We made it!
60. And now we save the poor little dude.
61. THE DUDE IS FREE. OUR MISSION IS COMPLETE.
62. I AM EGYPT’S NUMBER ONE ASSASSIN.
63. ACCORDING TO ME.
64. I am ready to try gladiator mode!
65. Lots of gladiators are running towards me. All that time spent watching Ninja Warrior UK WAS NOT IN VAIN.
66. I am taking on the horde like a BOSS.
67. I am a goddamn warrior
68. I have pierced myself on a spiiiiike.
69. Gladiatoring is dangerous.
70. There is BLOOD ON MY HANDS.
71. And the sand, and these obstacles, and everywhere, really.
73. BACK and I will lead this new opponent into a trap.
74. Follow me to your death by spike!
75. My opponent has died by spike.
76. I have also accidentally died by spike.
77. But I will avenge MY OWN DEATH.
78. At some point. When I get better at gladiatoring.
79. Where the hell is Senu?
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