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Kim Kardashian

This Guy Painted A Portrait Of Kim Kardashian Naked With His Penis

Yep, that's the headline...

Friday, December 12, 2014 - 16:52

You know you've made it when a guy has taken the time to paint a picture of you using his penis as a brush. Right?

Well Uwe Max Jensen is said guy, and Kim Kardashian is the lucky lady who he's painted.

The 44-year-old Danish performance artist chose Kim K's infamous nude Paper magazine cover to recreate with his body, which he says was tricky when it came down to the finer details. No kidding.

“I have my penis in one hand and the canvas in the other,” he told the Daily Dot. “I have a very skilled penis, art-wise.”

Jensen said it took about 8-10 hours to complete, and used acrylic paint as the material of choice.

“If one is ill-equipped, it is difficult to reproduce the small details,” he told the Copenhagen Post. “But if one is well-endowed, it is easier to produce a better painting.”

Clearly pleased with the outcome, the artist loves that his penis has several uses.

“My penis is an organ. I need it to reproduce, and for sex and joy,” Jensen said. “But I can also use it in my art, and that’s joyful for me on more levels.”

Happy Friday!

#BreakTheInternet: Pop Culture’s Most Controversial Magazine Covers

John Lennon & Yoko Ono, Rolling Stone, January 1981: On sight, John’s nudity in Annie Leibovtiz’s Rolling Stone cover is the most shocking thing about this magazine cover… until you hear the photo was taken just hours before John’s assassination.

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Demi Moore, Vanity Fair, August 1991: Annie Leibovitz also shot Demi Moore’s iconic pregnancy cover for Vanity Fair, which has since been copied by everyone from Britney Spears to Jessica Simpson. Scout LaRue, you were one famous baby bump!

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Britney Spears, Rolling Stone, April 1999: David LaChapelle shot 17-year-old supposed virgin Britney Spears in her underwear, clutching a Teletubby, for Rolling Stone magazine. We all know where the Britney story went from there.

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Kanye West, Rolling Stone, February 2006: Thought the whole Yeezus move from Kanye West was a recent thing? Nuh-uh. David LaChapelle photographed Yeezy as Jesus Christ – complete with crown of thorns – back in 2006.

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Jennifer Aniston, GQ, January 2009: Golden girl Jennifer Aniston posed naked on the cover of GQ except for a striped tie. Michael Thompson was the man behind the lens, as Jen-An gave Angelina Jolie a sexy run for her money.

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Lindsay Lohan, Purple Fashion, Spring 2010: Photographed by Terry Richardson, LiLo posed as Jesus Christ for Purple Fashion’s cover, while inside the issue she pulled down her underwear to reveal a much smaller butt than Kim K’s.

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Lady Gaga, Vogue Hommes Japan, September 2010: Another one Terry Richardson was responsible for saw Lady Gaga draped in meat, with animal rights activists up in arms, before Mother Monster went on to wear a full-meat gown to the 2010 MTV VMAs.

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True Blood’s Alexander Skarsgard, Anna Paquin & Stephen Moyer, Rolling Stone, September 2010: Two guys and a girl naked was always going to be a talking point, but add a load of blood and Matthew Rolston’s Rolling Stone cover became uber controversial.

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Glee’s Lea Michele, Cory Monteith & Dianna Agron, GQ, November 2010: At the height of their wholesome fame as Glee’s Rachel, Finn and Quinn, hot threesome Lea, Cory and Dianna posed in their underwear for none other than Terry Richardson.

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Azealia Banks, Dazed & Confused, September 2012: Sharif Hamza snapped Azealia Banks blowing up a condom for Dazed. She’s promoting safe sex, no?

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Kim Kardashian & Kanye West, L’Officiel Hommes, March 2013: Had the 'Bound 2' video come first, we might not have been quite as shocked by Nick Knight’s Kimye cover for L’Officiel Hommes, where it pretty much looks like the hot couple are having hot sex.

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Rihanna, Lui, May 2014: Mario Sorrenti shot RiRi for French magazine Lui, where the Bajan babe decided to #FreeTheNipple, piercing and all.

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Kim Kardashian, Paper, December 2014: Kim Kardashian’s oiled booty, shot by Jean-Paul Goude, went on a mission to #BreakTheInternet as it was unveiled in November 2014. We reckon those buns of steel could break a lot of things!

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