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12 Mistakes Everyone Makes In The First Term Of University

Surprise: Hooking up with a housemate is a bad idea.

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Monday, October 2, 2017 - 09:56

So you've stolen your parents colander, packed up the best selection of clothes in your wardrobe, and sworn to leave your awkward, bumbling self in the past.

Now that you're a fully grown adult, there are certain skills you probably think you already have down. Namely that you can cook a chicken without contracting salmonella and know when to stop drinking tequila before your stomach needs to be pumped.

But there are still a bunch of lessons that are yet to niggle their way into your cusp-of-adulthood brain. Behold, the twelve mistakes that every single person makes during the first term at Uni. 

1. Spending your life savings on brand new editions of books that you'll never read.

A solid 80% of the books on your reading list can be found in the Uni library. The rest can be discovered on Google Books or Kindle for a much friendlier price than the extortionate campus shop. Besides, there's always SparkNotes.

2. Using the remainder of your student loan to spend a crazy amount of cash on one of those Freshers wristbands.

Turns out it probably isn't cost effective to shell out £60 on a ticket that gives you access to 10 nights out, when you'll probably only go to around three of the scheduled events. Might be time to start thinking about simple arithmetic and figuring out a realistic budget.

3. Hooking up with that babe of a housemate who you've had your eye on all week.

The absolute classic. This guy is a) good-looking and b) funny for the first 72 hours you know him. After that, he turns out to be vain and immature and also probably has a girlfriend at home that he neglected to mention all week. Cool.

4. Unleashing your inner Jamie Oliver and almost burning down the entire campus.

With all that spare time between lectures, Uni seems like the perfect time to test your culinary talents and impress your new mates. Unfortunately, putting tin-foil in the microwave is something of a fire hazard and your housemates won't take well to attempted murder.

5. Signing up to every single society going.

The Viking Society? Sounds educational *and* hilarious. Stitch 'n' Bitch combines knitwear with personal drama, so that's an absolute must. And you just *have* to witness the incredible scenes at the Custard Wrestling Society.

Flash-forward two years later and you're still receiving email updates about the ten societies you ditched after the first meet-up.

6. Skipping the library orientation and not being able to figure out the printers for a solid three years.

Maybe you were too busy collecting extra slices of free pizza from the promotional Dominos van during the first week, but the library does actually turn out to be pretty important in the long run. It makes sense to know the basics about the filing system.

7. Latching onto the first group of people you meet and then realising they're beyond awful.

Probably the most common mistake students make. The first people you meet might be ~okay~ but it soon turns out that they're just not your sort of pals and the friendship takes a bit of a nosedive from then on.

8. Not signing up to the Doctor's surgery when you had the chance.

You're convinced this will be the last thought that flashes through your mind before you finally succumb to Fresher's Flu. Register ASAP and you'll never have to worry about making it to the morgue without a bit of medical attention.

9. Getting the fancy dress vibe totally wrong.

The Student's Union said the theme was nightwear, but apparently turning up on a night-out wearing full length Winnie The Pooh pyjamas isn't quite the sexy vibe everyone else was going for. So much for turning over a new, cool leaf.

10. Worrying way too much about second year housing.

For some reason it seems like the upmost importance to have a rough draft of people you wouldn't mind living with in second year by November. As fate would have it, this is around the time when you start realising your Freshers pals are absolute knobs and you'd rather die than live with most of them for another 12 months.

11. Taking your assignments way too seriously.

Look, we're not saying coasting through your first year is the *right* attitude to have, but let's all remember that the results don't count towards your final degree. And this is literally the one time in your life when you can let loose and have a bit of fun.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

12. Comparing the experience with all your school friends on social-media.

Why do they look like they're having more fun? Do they not miss home at all? How have they settled in so quickly?

It's worth remembering that an Instagram upload is literally five seconds out of a person's twenty-four hour day and that it takes some time to feel totally comfortable at Uni. Hang on in there, folks.

 

 

 

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