13 Things People Don't Tell You When You Become A Fully Functioning Adult
Welcome to the real world, suckers.
It’s officially summer time, which means some people out there will be graduating from school/college/university and the like and will be entering the REAL WORLD.
Well, if you’re one of those people and you’re thinking it's all sunshine and ice cream, then you're out of luck, we're afraid. Here's what people don't tell you about becoming a proper, fully fledged adult...
1. You will never actually *FEEL* like an adult
Hence the reason why you’ll be rocking up to Glastonbury 20 years from now and demanding that those pesky kids stop laughing at your 'dancing'.
2. But on the flip side, you will never look at a teenager the same way. No they are not on your level, they are 14 and it disgusts you
"Was I ever this annoying?", you'll ask yourself. Yes, yes you were.
3. Whatever exams you just spent months crying and stressing over? Nobody cares about them now
‘It’s not what you know, it’s who you know’ is a real thing, and you don’t know anyone because you were busy staying in and studying/watching Netflix in the dark.
4. Getting a job is Hunger Games IRL
Love the J-Law movies? Well, you’re about to star in your very own franchise about killing fellow young people (with your words) in order to succeed, because that is what every job interview ever is.
5. Just because you now call yourself an adult, it doesn’t mean your life automatically falls into place
Same old shiz but a different day.
6. Living at home becomes depressing, but moving out is just too much
Doing your own washing, cooking AND cleaning? Who can live like this?
7. Keeping in touch will school/uni friends becomes a nightmare because you don’t see them every second of the day
Whatsapping just isn’t as fun as MSN Messenger used to be.
8. You’ve finally got to change that embarrassing email address you’ve had since you were 11
Worse still, it’s a Hotmail. The horror.
9. Tax is a thing that will actually happen to you
You are responsible for things like ‘your own tax’ now. What is this life? When you were in Maths for all those years, not one teacher thought to mention tax to you.
It’s surely the most Maths thing you could have been taught, is the thing though. A tiny little module on tax and all of your night sweats would have disappeared. Just pray you don’t ever become self-employed.
10. You have to deal with real money now
Because you probably know by now that any currency you were using before your 18th birthday was actually just Monopoly money. What? Your parents didn't tell you?
11. You will realise just how lucky you were that your parents dealt with your crap for so long
Urgh, teenage you was the worst, and you’re finally able to see that seriously, you were awful. And with that revelation comes your newfound respect for your parents. Your poor, poor parents.
12. If you’re now a ‘single adult’, prepare to be shoved onto any mutual friend anyone has ever had
Because apparently being single when you’re 21 is the most insane thing in the entire world.
13. And of course, welcome to a world where taxis cost more than your weekly shop
DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH TAXIS COST THOUGH? Your dad was doing it FOR FREE for the last 18 years, and now the only thing showing up on your bank statement more than Uber is Dominos.