14 Things You Can Do To Trick People Into Thinking You're A Grown-Up
But really you have the mental capacity of a 13-year old...
The best advice my Dad ever gave me was: “You’ll never feel ready for anything in life.” He told me he still felt like he was 21. He was 60.
But although he needs to be real with his middle-aged self, he’s so right. How many of you feel like adults? Yeah, guess what you probs still won’t in ten years. But what you can do is fool everyone around you into thinking you’re got the whole grow-up thang down.
BUT FIRST - CAN ADULTS PASS A REAL GCSE? FIND OUT BELOW....
Just follow these handy steps...
1. Say ‘it’s not really my business’ before giving your opinion on gossip
DYING. TO. KNOW.
2. Own a sewing kit
You don’t have to know how to sew but damn it you’ve got safety pins.
3. Wear matching socks
You know, if you have any.
4. Learn a fact about stocks and shares and drop it into convo
Because no one who isn’t grown up talks about Wall Street. God, how dull. ADULTING.
5. Keep your nails nice
Only people that can’t handle things chew their nails and bite their skin off. AND THAT IS NOT ME.
6. Have a tidy desk at work...
Because nothing says ‘I’ve got my sh*t together’ like carefully placed post-its and a nice stack of pens.
7. Say words like ‘mortgage’ and ‘ISA’...
No one else really knows what they’re all about so they won’t ask you to explain.
8. Keep a house plant alive
Or get a REALLY good fake one. It’s not like anyone checks.
9. Show up on time
It is literally the hardest thing in the world but leave five minutes early. Even if the thought of standing alone for those five minutes gives you major anxiety.
10. Keep your flat tidy
I moved out 12 years ago and my parents are still shocked when I don’t live in a sh*t tip.
11. Act totally fine when a friend is too busy to hang out with you
Even though inside you are LIVID.
12. Tell everyone how tired you are
All. The. Time.
13. Own a candle
It’s grown-up and it’s just nice.
14. Explain to everyone that you have back-to-back meetings
Because I'm very busy and important.
But if you still don't feel remotely together than thankk the gods that Hannah Witton is here to be your very own agony aunt...