11 Things I Wish I'd Known Before Getting A Boob Job
1. The pain. THE PAIN.
As told to MTV UK...
I’ve wanted a boob job ever since…. well, ever since my boobs didn’t grow, basically. Last year - over a decade later - I finally decided to take the plunge, leave the itty bitty titty committee behind me, and get a boob job.
Here’s 11 things I wish I’d known before going under the knife.
It’s OK to shop around
Let’s imagine you’ve got a big event coming up - your birthday party perhaps, or a friend’s wedding - that you need a snazzy new outfit for. You wouldn’t walk into a shop and buy the first dress you clapped eyes on, would you? You’d want to browse for a bit, assess all of the options.
Selecting a cosmetic surgeon is exactly the same. I booked an initial consultation with one of the biggies, and was so taken in by their sales patter that I never even considered looking anywhere else.
I regret that now, because although I’m happy enough with my result, I didn’t have the best overall experience. This could have been very different had I taken the time to meet with a few companies, rather than just being all like; ‘GREAT I’LL HAVE TWO BREASTS, PLEASE’, at the first place I went.
An initial consultation does not commit you to anything - it’s perfectly fine to say ‘thanks for the information, I’ll let you know if I want to proceed’, and then book appointments at every other cosmetic surgery within a 10 mile radius.
Prepare for the Big Sell
So this is probably WHY I ended up booking my surgery with the first - and only - company I met with: they knew how to sell, sell, sell.
In my naivety I went into that initial consultation with a ‘doctors appointment’ mentality, forgetting that rather than my unbiased GP, this was actually patient co-ordinator aka non-medical professional Gemma - who very much wanted me to part with £5,000 of my hard earned cash, please.
I’m not saying that she conned me, but looking back I was 100 percent taken in by the sales pitch. Remember - you are a customer first, and a patient second. Be a little cynical, don’t take everything they say at face value, shop around (see point #1).
GOOGLE THE SH*T OUT OF YOUR CHOSEN SURGEON
This is important. OK so ‘Gemma’ probs made your chosen surgeon sound like she personally invented boobs and can craft lady lumps so beautiful they turn water into wine (or something), but she’s hardly going to say ‘oh FYI he’s had a few dodgy results in the past too’, is she?
Google and the internet are your friends. Call it ‘internet stalking’ or call it ‘research’ - either way it’s essential.
There’s a ton of forums out there with women more than willing to share their experiences with various surgeons - valuable info before you commit to allowing one near your body with an actual sharp implement.
I found Twitter particularly helpful - I just typed my chosen surgeon’s name into the search bar, and browsed through the tweets that mentioned him. Some girls had even shared pics of their results, so I could see first hand that he was - as one woman wrote - ‘an artist’.
And on that note, let’s talk CCs
Once you start down the boob job path CCs - the unit of measurement used for implant size - will become your obsession.
IMPORTANT FACT: 25cc is literally only the equivalent of one teaspoon, so while 300cc may sound way bigger than 275cc, it’s really actually not. Just something to keep in mind.
Obviously you’ll have a rough idea of what cup size you want to be, and your surgeon can advise on what implant will get you to that.
Don’t just Google ‘what size CC for a D Cup’ though - because it massively varies from girl to girl, depending on how much breast tissue you already have, your height, weight, and more.
This brings us to my next point:
Ask ALL of the questions at your sizing
Right, so here’s another way in which I really wasn’t very good at getting a boob job (who knew that you could be bad at being a cosmetic surgery patient? Apparently my talents are endless).
A sizing is when you meet with your chosen surgeon to discuss which size and type of implants you want. There’s high profile, low profile, round, anatomical (also known as teardrop) - and that’s before you even get STARTED on size.
With all those options, it’s important that you ensure you’re getting exactly what you want. I walked in, said I wanted a natural looking C-cup, and went for the first implants my surgeon pointed at.
‘Those’ll get you to a C’, he said.
‘OK great I’ll take ‘em’, I replied, after briefly trying them on with a specially modified bra and having a quick glance in the mirror.
Yeah. Don’t do that. Try on at LEAST five different sizes, take your time looking at them from every possible angle, and ASK. QUESTIONS.
‘Will these get me to a full C?’
‘What’s the biggest implant size before we start moving into D-cup territory?’
‘Is high profile the best option for me?’
‘Will these look as big once they’re under my tissue and muscle and not propped up in this fairly odd bra?’
‘Do you have any before and after photos of girls who originally had the same cup size as me, and also opted for this size implant?’
Just some of the questions I wish I’d asked.
Take a pal
I would really advise taking a friend or family member (maybe not your dad, that might be weird) with you to the sizing appointment/surgical consult.
Don’t worry if you don’t like flashing your nuddy bits - you can get changed behind a curtain, and then it’s just a case of slipping the various sample implants into a vest bra thing.
I wish I’d had someone with me to discuss sizes: you can talk to a friend in a way that you can’t with a surgeon, and it’ll make you feel more comfortable and relaxed having them there.
Not all surgeons do it the same way
After my operation – which all went very smoothly – I was sent home in ‘strapping’; essentially really tight plastic bandages stuck to my chest, which would remain on until my 7 day post-op appointment.
This was horribly uncomfortable, and less than 24 hours later I was having a crisis of confidence in my surgeon, partly thanks to an intense forum browsing session in which I discovered only 1 other person who was being subjected to a week of strapping.
It appeared that everyone else was either wearing a compression band (why didn’t I have one of those?) or being allowed to let their tatas hang wild and free (oh the JEALOUSY).
After my initial panic had subsided, however, I had a broader search – and realised that all surgeons have their own systems and ways of achieving their perfect result.
The absolute best thing you can do is listen to your surgeon, follow their instructions to the letter, and simply raise any concerns or questions you have with them.
In fact, screenshot this bit or something, because that’s the number one bit of advice that I wish someone had given me: DO NOT BE AFRAID TO ASK ALL OF THE QUESTIONS.
Do not underestimate the PAIN you will be in.
Seriously, note the capital letters. P.A.I.N.
Apparently some girls say they really don’t feel much pain after the op. You know what I say to them? You are either very lucky, or you are LYING.
I thought I’d have a few aches similar to pre-menstrual boob pain - and be back at work in a couple of days. I actually SCOFFED at my mum when she suggested I might like her to come and look after me for a week or so.
Oh boy was I wrong.
Do not underestimate how much pain you will be in, because holy. crap. it hurts. I think my blasé attitude towards recovery made it more of a shock too, and harder to deal with.
I couldn’t move. Literally, I couldn’t roll over to get out of bed, because any tiny movement that caused my pectoral muscles flinch even 0.001 of a centimetre sent shooting agony throughout my chest.
My mum (who very kindly forgave me for earlier SCOFFING and arrived at my bedside like a wonderful angel) had to lift me out of bed like a little baby, while I whimpered… like a little baby.
Basically my first 3 days post-surgery consisted of holding an ice pack to my boobs and a sort of low-level moaning slash crying. Hot, right?
I’m not trying to scare you, I’m trying to prepare you – but just incase you’re now sobbing in terror, I will say this: by Day 4 I felt much more human. By Day 7 the pain was almost completely gone. You can, and will, get though it if this is what you really want.
Ice, Ice baby
ICE PACKS ARE YOUR FRIEND. Yes OK, the painkillers were obviously my number 1 go to guys, but nothing soothed those booblars quite like some ice.
I found that packs of pre-made frozen margherita (you know, the ones that come in pouches) actually worked best, because I could shove them into my surgical bra and they sort of moulded to the shape of my boobs.
Top (classy) tip for you there.
Oh yeah, so if you don’t naturally sleep on your back – you’re not having a proper night’s sleep for a WHILE after your op.
The majority of surgeons instruct breast augmentation patients to sleep on their backs for at least 3-4 weeks, in order to let the implants settle in their correct position.
Sleeping on your side or front can dislodge the implants before the scar tissue that holds them in place has formed, and you’ll end up with boobs up in yo’ armpits. Not ideal.
My surgeon also told me to sleep propped up at a 45 degree angle for 2 weeks, which is hella uncomfortable and not exactly conductive to serious snoozing.
I ended up buying an angled ‘bed wedge’ off of the internet (imagine a big slice of cheese made out of foam) which actually saved my sanity – it was far easier than attempting to prop myself up with pillows.
I wish I’d known just how hard sleeping properly was going to be for those first few weeks though, I would have savoured that last night far more if I had.
Very few people love their result to begin with
Right, this may be the final point, but it’s the most important one: EVERYONE goes through some form of boob greed/regret following their surgery. Eveeeeerrryyyyyoooooone.
In my case it was that I felt my new breasts weren’t big enough. I’d stand looking in the mirror thinking ‘ALL THAT MONEY AND PAIN AND THEY BASICALLY LOOK THE SAME’.
I even called up my surgeon to find out how quickly I could get them redone with a bigger implant size, before I realized I’m literally not a Kardashian and don’t have that kind of money just lying about.
What I wish I’d know then is that this is totally normal. You’ll very quickly adapt to your new size, and it can be easy to forget what they were like before. Make sure you take loads of ‘before’ pics so that you can refer back to them and remind yourself of the changes.
Also keep in mind that it takes up to a year for everything to settle and for you to have your proper, final result.
I’m 4 months post-op now and my boobs have changed SO much since those first couple of weeks when I hated myself for picking ‘small’ implants.
Being allowed to wear proper, underwired bras after 6 weeks also changed my opinion – sports bras do tend to squish erythang down, so you won’t really be able to get a feel of your new size until then.
One of the most helpful things I read while obsessing over my result was this:
“At 6 days you’ll hate them. At 6 weeks you’ll like them. At 6 months you’ll love them.”
Words to live by, boob job pals. Words to live by.
Pics From 2015 That Will Restore Your Faith In Humanity
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