12 Small Tragedies Of Being The Middle Child
Being the middle-child is the worst.
Being sandwiched between an older sibling and a younger sibling can be summed up pretty concisely: 1. nobody knows what you're doing, 2. nobody cares.
Even though slipping under the radar *can* be a great thing, for the most part, being the middle child is a series of small tragedies that make up the larger part of your life.
1. You're regularly left behind during family outings/holidays.
Turning around to discover everyone has sodded off back to the hotel and you're going to have to forge a new life for yourself in Malta sounds familiar.
2. You consistently get lumbered with the worst chores.
The older sibling has more influence to negotiate for a better a deal, while the younger sibling just refuses to do anything at all.
3. Hand-me-downs make up 80% of your wardrobe.
Being in the perfect age-bracket to inherit rags is fine, but it stings a little when your younger sibling escapes the same fate.
4. On at least one occasion, a close family member has forgotten your birthday.
NBD, it's not like you literally gave birth to me, mum.
5. Speaking of which, your milestone celebrations are typically a dud.
*lets off solitary party-popper*
6. You will forever struggle with the concept of making a decision.
Being asked for your opinion is both flattering and confusing. What are other people saying? How do we please everyone?
7. Playing the mediator means you never quite got the hang of sharing your emotions.
Holding your siblings at arms length while you calmly neutralise their argument doesn't give you any time to kick off yourself.
8. Despite your unwavering loyalty to each of them, your siblings regularly team up against you.
A piss-poor repayment after everything you've done.
9. There are significantly less pictures of you around the house.
Either this is an issue with how photogenic you are, or you somehow dodged every single camera growing up.
10. You aren't the cute one *or* the accomplished one; meaning you're the...
11. People are always pointing out how "different" you are to your siblings.
It happens, Janet, you old crow.
12. But despite everything, you've developed a heightened survival instict and a healthy respect for the underdog.
Because you know nobody is watching your back.
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