12 Types Of Guy You'll Definitely Meet On A Night Out
They're literally all awful (except number twelve)
There are a few things that are bound to happen on a night out. 1) Someone will refuse to get in the taxi because they hate their outfit and think they look fat, and 2) The entire gang will stumble across the twelve types of guy who lurk in every pub/bar/nightclub across the country.
1. That guy from school who used to throw fruit at your head and now wants to catch up.
Funnily enough, years of taking a wide selection of Granny Smith, Pink Lady, and Golden Delicious apples to the skull isn't exactly the best groundwork for a potential romance, is it Benji? Kindly shove off pal.
2. The guy who's trying to crack onto your drunk friend and won't take no for an answer.
Said guy is lucky if he's given a formal warning by a sober member of the gang, but if he persists, that one friend who is 15x more terrifying than the rest is given free reign to put the literal fear of God into him.
3. The joker who decides to buy everyone a drink and then randomly disappears into the abyss.
Who is this guy? What is he getting back from this? This poor bloke will wake up to a mountain of debt (and regret) in the morning, but with five tequilas down him he's ready to purchase shots for the five thousand. And who are you to stop him?
4. The guy who thinks he's part of the gang because he was asked to take a group pic.
Hate to break it to the guy, but the only thing we wanted from him was to take a set of pictures - portrait *and* landscape - that aren't blurred and haven't beheaded the tallest member of the group. Both tasks that he probably failed at on an epic scale.
5. The guy who pushes in front of you in the kebab line and apologises when he sees your hot friend.
First impressions count, maestro. And it's safe to say this guy and his completely insatiable need for a chicken kebab hasn't done himself any favours when it comes to wooing said pal.
Rare footage of this moron hunting down his dream snack.
6. The guy who has nothing to say in person but is an absolute maniac on the dancefloor.
He might be completely chill IRL but the entire dancefloor needs to give him a birth of five metres because there's no knowing where those erratic shapes will take him next.
7. The guy who tries it on with literally every female in the room and still goes home alone.
God loves a trier. Unfortunately, no-one else in the bar does. *Mic drop*
8. The guy who insists on doing *SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS* and gets carried out of the bar by 11:30pm.
Probably with his own sick and a dash of cheap tequila down his top. We've all been there.
9. The guy who spills his drink over everyone's new outfit as a way to initiate conversation.
A simple hello would suffice, but this guy thinks its hilarious to make the kind of entrance that destroys the outfit that took a solid sixty minutes of preparation.
10. The guy who is about 15 years too old to be in the club but still rocks up in ripped jeans.
Hey, we're all about people embracing their youth and having a good time. But this guy rocks up alone, lurks in the corner, and tries to make a move on 18-year-olds. No thanks.
11. The guy who borrowed his older brother's fake ID and thinks he can try it on with the ~ladies~.
This baby-faced chancer is having the time of his life, but unfortunately might be trying his luck too much when he tries to crack on with the best-looking girl in the room.
12. And the diamond in the rough. The guy who acts as an unpaid bodyguard when you and your pals are walking to the taxi rank.
This guy is probably a vague family friend, a sibling's football captain, a distant relative, or just a nice human being who fancies leaving the club for a few minutes.
What a gem.
Now let's all get checking out Connor Franta opening up about his social media dos and don'ts...