10 Things We Want To See From Candidly Nicole
We're crossing our fingers and toes for a UK air date for Candidly Nicole or all our rainbow-haired dreams will be crushed…
By Portis Wasp
Ever since Nicole Richie announced her return to television screens in a new reality show that is based on her hilarious Twitter feed, we have been counting down the days until her candid 140-word confessions and questions about life, selfies, and belfies airs on VH1 on July 17th. Even though that’s only the US air date… We’re just preparing ourselves for when it eventually crosses the pond.
Nicole has come a long way since The Simple Life, having traded her former BFF Paris Hilton for marriage, babies, clothing lines, presenting gigs, and a raspberry swirl of a hairdo that we just know Riff Raff is going nuts over right now. But wait… its now electric blue! This girl moves fast.
Here is a list of 10 things we really want to see on Candidly Nicole and if we don’t then we’ll be forced to do something absolutely outrageous. Like buy all the copies of Paris’ new single, Come Alive. We’re so not kidding.
1. Accessories and lots of them!
Remember when Nicole Richie made oversized sunglasses relevant? Well of course you do.She has in fact made lots of oversized accessories relevant over the last decade,like oversized bangles, oversized totes, and that much talked about oversized two-piece bikini… We expect some great accessories from Candidly Nicole this season, and if we were to call it, we’d say that the next oversized accessory trend for AW14 will be started by Nicole only half an hour into the first episode.
2. Kim K Putdowns
It’s no secret that Nicole and Paris Hilton don’t have a lot of love for Kim K, nor is it an exaggeration to say that Kim’s new Hollywood game nearly put us in the hospital with exhaustion and a case of the E-list sads. So we have high hopes for a not too obvious, but really quite obvious, Kardashislagging from the once Queen of Mean.We know you’ve still got it in you, girl…
3. A Britney Spears Cameo
After being spanked on stage at Britney’s Las Vegas show, which Nicole called “the greatest moment of her life”, we can totally see these two meeting up for a Starbucks to discuss fifty shades of hair dye, Paris’ new single, and…
Who the fuck is Felicia?
— Nicole Richie (@nicolerichie) July 2, 2014
We love a good mystery, and something tells us that Felicia will play a very big part in the first series of Candidly Nicole. Nicole couldn’t be tweeting about Britney’s old assistant, could she? The plot thickens.
5. Awkward Conversations with Dad
Nicole asks her famous father the questions we’d love to ask our own pops, like “Who is your favourite child?” and “Do you take Viagra?” Okay, maybe we don’t need an answer to the second question, but we’re Dancing On The Ceiling at the thought of Lionel Richie being put on the spot by his naughty minx of a daughter whilst the cameras roll. He’s like a way more relevant Bruce Jenner, if you were.
Trying to convince @joelmadden to get a long fake ponytail so we can make love Avatar style
— Nicole Richie (@nicolerichie) July 2, 2014
Yes, we actually want to see this – in HD.
7. Quotes to Call Our Own
We shouldn’t need to remind you that Nicole is the author of one of our favourite books, The Truth About Diamonds. A book that provided countless quotes that we stole and called our own for the last eight years. Only we’ve come to realise that it’s time to retire ending our texts with “Have a nice rest of your life”, so we’re counting on Nicole delivering some memorable zingers we can call our own for the next eight years.
8. A Big Hair Colour Reveal
Nicole changes her hair colour more often than Kelly Osborne, and that is saying something. But colour us demanding, we think Nicole should go out with a bang on her series finale and reveal a daring new colour just before the credits roll! What’s more shocking than electric blue you might ask? Well here’s a suggestion… Brown. Your fans will never see it coming!
9. More Mariachi Twerk-Offs
Because a six-second clip on Vine isn’t nearly enough for our liking. Beetlejuice would be proud.
10. BFFs Reunited
We know these two aren’t as close as they used to be, but Nicole and Paris literally invented the term Celebrity BFF. We don’t want to live in a world where these two aren’t making fun of simpletons for our viewing pleasure, so it would make our day if they both dusted off their 2004 Teen Choice Awards dresses, got a spray tan, and embraced The Simple Life one last time.
It would really go a long way to validating our purchase of Paris’ new single, too.