13 Awkward Stages Of A First Kiss
Don't throw up, don't throw up...
When you see first kisses with someone new in the movies it always looks so romantic, passionate and perfect. But IRL, things are a little more awkward. And when we say a little we mean THE WHOLE THING IS CRINGE.
You may recognise these stages of dying inside...
1. Wait, do they want to kiss *me*?
Are you sure you weren’t looking at the girl behind us?
2. Sweet baby Jesus, I may pee…
Damn our weak bladder.
3. They're so fit and I’m a troll that lives under a bridge…
Why didn’t we do our eyebrows. Good one, us. IDIOT.
4. I'm so nervous i feel sick. What if I throw up in their mouth?
We’ll die. Right here on the floor. Not even another Taylor/Kanye beef will bring us back.
5. What’s my breath like?
What if no one in life has ever told us that we have bad breath and this is the time that it happens?
6. DID I BRUSH MY TEETH THIS MORNING?...
Think, thiiiiink. I DON’T REMEMBER. Where am I? I’m sweating. Am I having a heart attack?
7. Oh god they're leaning in...
Ok it’s happening. My tongue feels like a dead fish. DO SOMETHING.
8. Get the right mouth position dammit…
Crap, that’s their nose.
9. What do I do with my hands?
I can’t even feel them anymore. Maybe it’s a stroke.
10. What do I do with my tongue?
Do I go washing machine? I'm panicking.
11. I’m going to cry, I’ve forgotten how to kiss someone…
We literally can’t picture one person we’ve kissed. Why? Whyyyyyyy?
12. What are their teeth up to?
Those are their teeth right? Or is their tongue like cement?
13. Thank the actual heavens, it’s done…
We need a drink.