10 Ways To Actually Make Long Distance Relationships Work
When this cruel world throws you and bae miles and miles away from each other, everyone and their mate seems to be full of 'helpful' tips about how to make things work (mainly "FORGET ABOUT THEM AND F**K SOMEONE ELSE!"...thanks guys).
But fear not, below are some real life golden nuggets of wisdom that have actually been tried out and actually work. Actually.
1. Be honest about what is about to happen to youIf you’re about to spend a lot of time apart, have an open and honest conversation with your partner about the potential outcome of this.
If you face up to the fact that it’s going to be really difficult, that you’re going to both have to put effort into this and hey, it might not actually work out, some of the pressure’s taken off you. Make sure you’re both aware that you’re sharing the responsibility to participate in this. Takes two to tango ‘n’ all that.
2. Not constant, but very very frequent communication is keyWe are truly #blessed with publicly accessible wi-fi and a buffet of social media options we have at our fingertips rn. Being at the forefront of each other's mind is important; you don’t have to write essays to each other all day, but forwarding a picture of something that made you laugh / a dumb thing someone just said / a random thought really does make all the difference.
Tagging your SO in memes, sending links to LOLsome videos etc shows that you’re thinking about them all the time. You’re so cute.
3. Harness snapchat and become a selfie queenAs fun as that Meryl meme is, they do need to see your face and you need to see theirs. Remind them of what they’re missing - even if you do have eyes three times their normal size and are spewing rainbow vomit.
4. Make time for proper chats and make them on Skype or FacetimeSchedule in some actual ~time~ to have proper talks with each other so you can verbally download each other’s lives. Even if you have FaceTime on and your phone propped up while you’re wandering around your room and getting snacks or whatever, that actually helps as it’s as close to hanging out IRL as you can make it.
If you schedule a time, stick to it. Don’t cancel on each other when plans get in the way and end up not speaking to each other for AGES because you can’t find the time.
5. Ensure you include dirty talkBecause thirst.
6. Be honest about how you’re feelingLack of IRL face time can make emotions run higher / seem stronger, and when the only person you want to be with is SO FAR AWAY it gets even worse. Tell them. They’ll appreciate that they mean so much to you and be able to help you (or at least try some soothing words from a distance).
If they called on you because you were the only person who could make them feel better, you’d appreciate the love too, right? RIGHT? (If you’re thinking ‘jfc NO’ then maybe time to rethink why you’re doing this whole long distance thing in the first place…)
7. Book trips to see each other in advanceMainly because it’s cheaper, but also because it’s great to have that time booked in and something to look forward to - even if it’s really far in the distant future. When you’re together, ensure you have some downtime booked in - if you knacker yourselves out ~doing things~ the whole time it might start to seem like a burden.
8. Become robot friendsThere are apps that let you watch TV shows at the same time now because THE FUTURE IS HERE, which is another great way of being virtual friends as close to IRL friends as possible because you can message / leave your phones on speaker and slag off the characters together. Honestly it’s so great.
9. When you see them, arrange for a drink with those friends you see them with on social media all the timeThis is actually an important way to not become a crazy jealous person. If you see people IRL from photos, it proves that you’re real to them and they’re real to you and that you’re not all imaginary internet people. This stops you getting jealous of their mates, and their mates will be more understanding about their commitments to you once it’s proven you actually exist.
Do the same with your friends, obviously.
10. Sounds a bit lameo, but always saying goodnight and good morning is very much a decent thing to doIt’s just lovely.
Now why not have a watch of a bunch of awkward humans playing an entirely awkward game of sexy would you rather...?