12 Things Everyone Should Know About Sex Before Going To Uni
It'll save a whole lotta stress
So, you’re off to conquer the big bad world of University sex, eh? There are a million things to worry about when you leave the safety of your family home but hopefully sex doesn’t have to one of them thanks to this handy little guide.
From sexual feelings to feeling weird down there, just remember everyone has been there, you're not alone. However you identify, if at all, we’ve got you covered, babes.
But first check out Hannah Witton's guide to doing it, because of course...
1. Consent is key
And as Courtney Act says, it’s sexy. Just ICYMI, consent means being clear that they - and you - are saying yes to every sexual act, every step of the way. It means listening if someone says no or seems anything other than very clearly up for it. It means understanding someone has the right to change their mind and that if someone is under the influence, the lowering of their inhibitions may mean they are also unable to consent.
And if you need a referesher check out the below:
2. You can get free birth control at clinics
Well the last thing you want to be juggling is your lectures and a screaming baby, right? No but seriously, you can get free condoms, the morning after pill and more from the local Family Planning clinics. Plus if you pop to your doctor they can sort you out with other forms of contraception for absolutely nothing. Win.
3. People will hear you boning
The walls in halls or student accommodation are thin AF.
4. Casual sex is totally fine
We’ve been to uni, we get it. You can have sex with whoever you want, however you want - it's all about experimentation. Just make sure it’s what you want and that you’re safe - and remember that it's all about pleasure for everyone involved. Other than that – have at it, babes.
5. And it’s totally okay to not want a one night stand
Everyone is different. We’re all told that uni is meant to be a place of crazy casual sex but if that’s not you then that’s cool too. The last thing you want to do is something you weren’t that keen on doing in the first place.
6. It’s the time to experiment
You’re free from the confines of life in your parents’ house and it’s time to spread your sexual wings. Men, women, both? GO FOR IT. Learn what you really like and don’t be afraid to tell someone what you want. Don’t just go along with something that doesn’t feel right – speak up. Your partner knows just about as much as you.
7. STI’s are rife and so not worth it
Going bareback with someone new is not the answer. Yeah it might be so much easier in the heat of the moment, but guess what? STIs are more of one.
One in 10 young people in the UK have Chlamydia and that shiz spreads like wildfire so don't be a fool, wrap up his and/or your tool. Condoms and dental dams are the only type of contraception that protect you from STIs too, so if you are in a relationship with someone/s and are considering having unprotected sex, you both/all should get screened and treated for any STIs first.
Also don't forget that you can catch STIs from oral, so if you and the person you're having oral with haven't been tested, use protection like condoms and dental dams. Or if that puts you off then just don't do it until you have been.
8. You can identify as anything you want
Whether it be straight, cis or part of LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, genderqueer, bisexual, trans, queer and the community of asexual, pansexual, questioning, intersex and more) you don’t have to stick to one label. Hell, you don’t even have to label yourself at all.
9. You shouldn’t be having painful sex
And we aren’t talking Fifty Shades. If it hurts to have sex then go and see a doctor. We know it’s embarrassing but believe us they have seen A LOT worse.
10. Keep it a phone free zone
The internet is becoming increasingly rife with people uploading revenge porn of former partners. And while we get that it’s sometimes super tempting to film yourself or take a few snaps to send to the person you're seeing, but young (and old) people can have dumb AF moments where they think it’s okay to send them on to other people. Then before you know it, your pics are out there being circulated around people you don't know and you no longer have control over them.
Be safe and keep the camera outta the bedroom and if you do ever, ever send anything - even if it's to a partner - don't include your face in it, just in cases.
11. There is more to sexuality than just straight or gay
Bisexual = people who are attracted to more than one gender. There’s a huge sliding scale on this one – bisexuals might fancy men a lot and women only a little; they can fancy mostly women but occasionally men. The possibilities are endless.
Pansexual = when someone is pansexual it means they are attracted to people regardless of their gender. They are attracted to individuals rather than one particular gender or sexuality, and that can be whomever they fancy.
12. You might not want to have sex with anyone
Some people just don’t have sexual attraction to either gender and that’s totally fine. They may identify as asexual, someone who doesn’t feel sexual attraction, or a romantic asexual, someone who doesn’t have romantic feelings. However you feel, just do you.