Monday: Pop Shots!

The Streets Mike Skinner wants Dizzee Rascal to be a huge star again and reckons hes the man to do it.

A mate of the 'Dry Your Eyes' dude told the Daily Star, Mikes been bitten by the Dizzee bug and is desperate to get him on his Beats label. He wants to concentrate on making him the major star he should be.

Excellent. We hope Mr Skinner puts as much time into resurrecting his own pop career as well though. What's happened to the man who could once do no wrong? His new tune 'Prangin Out' has only reached No 25 in the charts.

Away from all matters dry land and we hear Katie Melua is playing one of the weirdest gigs we've ever heard of.

The corkscrew-headed croonette, who recently dressed as a demented circus performer for a video, is performing in a gas rig 300m under the North Sea in an attempt to set a record for the deepest ever underwater concert today (October 2).

The 2-hour gig will be watched by 15 fans plus the editor of the Guinness Book Of Records. Is Katie, 22, feeling 17 and going through a late teenage rebellion we wonder...

R&B princess Jamelia, meanwhile, edits todays 3am column and has issued a stark warning to her footy boyfriend Darren Byfield if he ever cheats.

Jamelia writes that she'd cut his balls off. And this is the lady who finds Lily Allens revenge song 'Smile' too naughty!

Finally... And the Robbie Williams saga continues... According to the Daily Star his mum has urged him to seek help for depression, however The Sun reports that Robs dad Pete has said the singer is merely exhausted and just needs to sleep in his own bed for once.

Wonder if he read the same Robbie kiss-and-tell as us.

A barmaid named Charlotte claimed in yesterdays Sunday Mirror that shes been seeing the star on the down-low for the past 18 months.

Its tea and food and television, she said of their relationship. Just so utterly normal and boring.

Hmmm, something tells us she wont be getting invited round for Earl Grey and X Factor again anytime soon.

SLJ